Quenelle des quenelles

It sounds better than ‘Dumpling of dumplings’ – although the English translation might be more apt as far as my silhouette is concerned. But let’s stick with the French for now…

Following my participation at last month’s Forum de l’Europe, it was suggested that I should perform at this year’s Bal des Quenelles – an annual celebration every Summer Solstice at the country residence of France’s best known comic and inventor of the Quenelle, Dieudonné. I waited patiently for confirmation and was rewarded with the offer of a 15-minute first-half slot, all expenses paid and a VIP backstage pass.

Two days before I was due to take the Eurostar to Paris, the mayoress of St-Lubin-de-la-Haye – a nondescript liberal feminist author – threatened to shut down the event, predictably citing ‘anti-Semitism’ and the risk of a breach of the peace. Dieudonné responded with typical defiance and humour. The mayoress’s letter was in fact a thinly disguised attempt to dissuade people from making the effort to attend: with the theme announced as a ‘Yellow Vests Special’ and an almost perfect weather forecast, the authorities’ frantic scaremongering was clearly intended to put a damper on things. But there was no doubt in my mind that Chabloz would go to the ball.

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Owen Benjamin parodies ‘Hava Nagila’

It will be interesting to see how this story develops. Forgive me for pointing out that I was first. I’m not alone:

190331 FAME

Forgive me also for not being able to post the link. It hardly needs to be mentioned that I was handed a 20-week suspended prison sentence for a similar musical faux pas

The most satisfying angle of the Owen Benjamin phenomenon is that less a year ago he applauded Israel’s murder of Palestinians in cold blood. More recently, he even dedicated a song to Israel patriot Tommy Rabbisohn. Benjamin also appeared regularly on Alex Jones’ InfoWars.

But now, all that has changed. He has seen the light. And it is glorious: the cherry on the top of the Rammstein icing.

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Chronic, hopeless and desperate

It’s at times like these that one gets to know who one’s true friends are. Huge thanks for all the kind and supportive messages received over the past few days. I am still waiting for proof – one SINGLE proof – of allegations made against me. So far, nada.

There was, however, enough proof to find lawyer Mark Lewis guilty of bringing his profession into disrepute. In a report published yesterday, the Jewish Chronicle predictably claimed I was one of his “attackers”. Poor man. In the warped minds of certain hacks, being asked questions in a civil manner equates to being “attacked”? Twice in the space of less than a week, this same publication has also stated that I was given a “two-year suspended sentence”. As one good friend notes: would that be illiteracy, ignorance, or a wish to mislead? Oh well, at least the JC can be said to act in the tribal interests of its readership.
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Charity under investigation as puppet-on-a-string earns musical restraining order

Suzanne she goes down
Once more to Ealing cop shop
She makes an umpteenth statement
Falsely claiming she’s a victim

And we know that she’s half crazy
That her strings are pulled in Barnet
And the lies are fed from Finchley
Oh but she’s too blind to see it
Yet Suzanne does her duty
Carries out her orders
Just keeps on spreading nonsense
In the hope somebody answers
With angry words and menace

And again she runs for cover
Begging Mr Plod to nick me
But he only shakes his helmet
As she stands there
Playing victim with her lies…

(Sincere apologies to fans of Leonard Cohen – RIP).

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